Archive for June 22nd, 2014

Apophatia IV


Big Things

If you haven’t noticed, I have been wrestling with the Big Things here lately: ‘God’ and life and death and judgement and hell and mercy and the nature of the Mystery beyond our ken, somehow a Person or Persons, who ‘is’ Love.

This isn’t academic theology. I have done that, and I was pretty good at it. At least my professors thought so.

This is rawer, the aftermath of the deconstruction of last winter, which was a sort of frigid sacramental purgatory, a Polar Vortex of the soul, an elemental wrestling with being and experience and beauty and the mystery of evil.

Also history.


That sounded way too dramatic. But unexpected changes, when one is pretty settled, are disconcerting, even when they are a blessing. And lately I have become aware that everyone’s life is an epic.

Creatures from the Tilted Planet

It occurs to me that we are so benighted that we do not even know the answer to the most fundamental question about the Cosmos.

Which is: are humans, and the earth, unique? It is evident that humans, unlike every other created being who is not in close association with humans -like dogs or veal calves- from the billion year old dense thing we call ‘a rock’, to the hundred year old still and silent being we call ‘tree’, are alone in feeling inner conflict, alone in spinning narratives to navigate Reality, alone in creating illusory worlds inside our heads.

So the Question is: is the fact that humans are so evidently fucked up in spite of the beauty and harmony we can perceive in What Is, the created world untouched by Humans, mean that this is probably the condition of ‘intelligent’ species wherever they exist, if they do exist? Does the ability to restructure -and distort- creation the way that humans do on earth inevitably coexist with inner conflict and moral blindness?

Or is Humanity unique?

After all, our planet is tilted on its axis: everything is skewed.

Plus, our hearts are off center.

In other words, we have no idea of where we exist within the universe.

We do not know very much at all, in fact, about that universe.

What kind of place IS this?

Knowing so little, from whence come human pride and hubris?


If St Thomas had lived longer he would have burnt the Summa.


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