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Archive for September 21st, 2011

Some Repairs

A few weeks ago I posted a recent icon and a request for prayer. I said then that I was still painting icons, but in fact I have not touched a brush since then. Besides the cataract in my left eye, which makes fine brushwork an ordeal, I also have a “trigger finger” on the ring finger of my right hand. A trigger finger is one that gets stuck in a bent position and can only straighten with a painful pop. It makes simple tasks problematic, not least holding a paintbrush.

I am going today to see an orthopedic surgeon; my doctor thinks he will inject it with steroids, which will, in her words, “buy you some time”.

And tomorrow I am scheduled to have the cataract removed, so hopefully in a few days I will again be able to paint.

Not painting has been strange, and I have come to see how much I relied on it spiritually. To be sure there are occasional stresses, like when a ruling pen blobs on the fine halo line you are trying to do, but most of the time it is stilling and deeply satisfying, praying with paint.

It occurs to me that this cataract is a sort of parallel to the state of my soul. My vision has been blurred in more ways than one. I’ve never considered this blog a confessional one- though I admire folks who are so honest about themselves- so I won’t go into detail, but in many ways, looking at the sad state of the world, the nation and the Church, I have lost focus. Combine that with various disheartening personal things and it seems that something has grown over my soul, just like it has over my eye, and things just don’t look clear. Thank God for the balm of my bride’s love and support.

Hopefully healing my eye will be a first step to healing  my soul.

Pray for me.

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